You can't stop the beat!

"Sing, sing a song

sing out loud, sing out strong

sing of good things, not bad

sing of happy, not sad

sing, sing a song

make it simple

to last your whole life long

don't worry if it's not good enough

for anyone else to hear

just sing, sing a song"

- Perry Como

As a parent of a toddler, you watch a LOT of movies. Over and over and over again. Thankfully, kids movies are actually pretty good these days. But today I popped in a VHS for Luke (and yes, we do still own a VCR). We dug deep in the box of cinema relics and went vintage. Luke watched Beauty and the Beast for the very first time. From the moment the movie started I was hooked. I would venture to say that I was more in to it than he was. I started singing and I could not stop. I knew every word to every song, even after all these years. And this sing-along opened a flood gate of memories for me.

When I was in elementary school, my cousins and sister and I would put on plays in our garage for my parents. There was a curtain, costumes and even an intermission. But the main focus of the evening was always the music. We would sing (and act out) Disney movies. But when I say "sing" I really mean "lip sync" to the soundtrack CD. It was still pretty awesome.

Years later, I remember attending a college weekend at UMHB with my bestie, Sara, during our senior year of high school. It was our first solo trip without the parents and we were feeling pretty cool in our independence. I think we even stopped and got convenience store cappuccinos just to solidify our maturity. But what I also remember is that we were jamming out in the car, to the Lion King soundtrack (and maybe even some Little Mermaid).

You see, I love to sing. It brings immense joy to my heart to express myself through song. I am not, however, a song writer. It pains me to sit and think about lyrics and hooks and verses and all that jazz. Believe me, I've tried. My passion lies more in the music. I enjoy finding a song that completely expresses my mood and thing singing it as loud as I can. Or dancing to it.

For this reason, I absolutely adore musicals. Chicago blew my mind. I enjoyed it so much that I literally high kicked out of the theater (it's true, there were witnesses). I say all of this because I think it is sad that animated musicals have gone the way of the dodo bird. While kid's movies today are funnier than they used to be, they lack some of that musical magic. Music is so expressive and joyous and moving that I do not understand why the decision was made to stop the music. It was a very stupid decision.

I have one last memory to share with you readers before I end my soapbox on another pointless topic. In 2004, I went to Las Vegas with 3 of my girl friends. It was an absolutely amazing trip. There were plenty of sights to see and things to do, but what made the trip for me was all of the singing that we did. I brought a video camera and we videoed ourselves on a consistent basis during the trip. One of the things we did was spontaneous song. We all did it. The camera would start rolling and one of us would make up a song about what we were doing or where we were going. It was completely unscripted and very silly. I remember vividly a song about Treasure Island, a song about the Bellagio fountains and a song about Ziegfried and Roy's tigers. But my favorite part was the day we rode the tram to the Palms hotel and casino. The four of us sat in the back seat. The bus was pretty crowded and the faint sound of music was playing over the speakers. I asked the driver to turn it up and he kindly obliged. "My Girl" was playing on the radio and without hesitation I started singing along, quite loudly. Pretty soon my friends joined in and then when it got to the chorus I shouted,"everybody". And you would not believe this but over half the bus started singing the chorus to that song. People were clapping and singing along and it was one of the best moments of my life. When the bus stopped and the song was over, the whole bus cheered. It was a magical moment. Scratch that, it was a musical moment. For that tram ride, and during that trip, I got a small taste of what it would be like to live in a musical. And I have to say that it suited me just fine.

So Disney,
bring back the musical. Let animation be fun again.

Thank you.

Listamania 7.0

I know, I know. This is a day late. But better late than never. I have a new thing going in my life and I would classify it as a good thing. Actually, a very good thing. And this good thing has given me lots and lots of reasons to smile lately. It feels so insanely good to be in the company of a person (or persons) who know how to truly get you laughing. Thankfully, I know several people in my life who can really crack me up. But that is another list, for another time. Today's list is dedicated to laughter and smiles. Eventhough that just sounded like a line from Carebears I will continue on. The new TV season is starting and I could not be more thrilled. So I want to make a list of the ten TV sitcoms that have had me rolling in laughter throughout my life. This is not in any order, just shows I like. I know some may disagree but... this is my Listamania, so deal with it.

1. Friends
2. Scrubs
3. Fresh Prince of Bell Aire
4. The Cosby Show
5. Modern Family
6. The Office
7. How I Met Your Mother
8. Seinfeld
9. Arrested Development
10. Cheers

Times they are a changin'

It seems like I am always starting a post with a reference to something that someone said to me. Well, this post will be no different. Someone near and dear to me asked if I write more in bad times than in good. Interesting question. And the answer is... yes. I do tend to get very emo and internal when the storm clouds roll in. And while that doesn't make for a very fun read, it sure provides a lot of inspiration for new material. I would like to work on this though. I do not want to be the Debbie Downer of the blog world. So starting today I am pledging to be more up-beat and whimsical in my musings. To kick this off I am doing something that I never would have thought possible - I am going to share a poem that I wrote. I am doing this because a) it was written in high school and b) I think it possesses a light-heartedness that suits the new me. So, here it goes:

FAT CANDY

I love were candy, I'd be fat

If sorrow were a fly swatter, I'd be flat

If marshmallows were dreams, I'd be a smore

If pentagons meant sanity, my count would be four

If friends were like mirrors, I'd live in vain

If fear were a sports car, I'd opt for a plane

If pennies were knowledge, I'd have 2 cents

If laundry were patience, I'd be the ball of lent

If men were sugar, I'd take mine sour

If pride were measured in minutes, I'd last an hour

If candles were maturity, I'd be at the end of my wick

If roses were honesty, I'd often need a prick

If hope were like water, I'd sometimes start to boil

If serenity were milk, I'd very quickly spoil

**As a disclaimer I need to say that I was 18. So I had a very limited knowledge of the world and most of the concepts in this poem. I would venture to say that this rhyme would be slightly different if I wrote it today. Thanks also to Rachel Bennet, who penned several of the lines with me, and Ms. Lawrence, my creative writing teacher. **

Listamania 6.0

I know that I have had lead fingers lately when it comes to this blog - meaning that they have leaned toward the heavy side. My blog is direct reflection of my life, so if I have been clunking through the last through posts it was because I was clunking through some moments in my life. Never fear though, because everything always ends up better than alright. And this season of my life is no different. My dad, sweet and honest man that he is, recently told me that my blog was starting to get a little depressing. I took his subtle advice and digested it. As luck would have it is a Wednesday, which means it's a Listamania day. What better way to fight the blog blues than with a little list? So... this one's for dad, and all those others who are tired of hearing me mope.

I actually stole this idea from someone else's blog. But it was such a good one that I don't feel at all bad about it (thank you Trey Weise). As summer has officially come to a close, the weather, and the activities that comprise said season ,are saying farewell. I will miss the sights, sounds and smells of summer. This revelation made me think about my senses, all 5 of them in fact, and the wonderful ways I use them on a daily basis. So, this weeks list is about favorites. It is my fab 5 favorites of my fab 5 senses. You better buckle in, because things are about to get crazy.




Things I love to smell:
1. sunscreen
2. men's cologne (especially Beckham for men)
3. wood burning
4. the river
5. bacon frying

Things I love to look at:

1. sunsets
2. the stars on a clear, dark night

3. Christmas lights

4. fall colors that pop against gray skies

5. flowers in full bloom

Things I love to hear:
1. good vocal harmonies
2. night time noises during the summer
3. rain outside my window
4. my little guy laughing wildly
5. music on the classical guitar or piano

Things I love to taste:

1. chocolate milkshakes

2. the first few sips of Dr.Pepper from the fountain

3. hot chocolate

4. strawberries

5. cheese

Things I love the touch of:
1. my baby boy's cheeks
2. blankets all around me in a cold room
3. hands holding mine
4. sand between my toes
5. water as I swim








There are other things that I love. But this list could get long and then no one would want to read it. I am going to take some advice from The Office's Michael Scott and K.I.S.S. - Keep It Simple Stupid. Happy Wednesday all!

Let the Records Show

I am going to be tooting my own horn here a little bit. Please allow it because I could use the affirmation. It has just been one of those weeks where multiple things weighed heavily on my mind and my heart. I was wearing quite the heavy yolk and feeling just miserable beneath its weight. You see, I am what you would call a decisive person. It has been said that I may even be "rash" in my decision making. And, I admit, I do things kind of on impulse sometimes. And, every time, I always think what a huge mistake that was. So, for me to not be able to make a decision, to be stuck in the in between, means one of two things: 1) that I know what I need to do, but I'm fighting it or 2) that my head and my heart are in a battle of motives and a victor hasn't been crowned yet.

It just so happens that there were two situations this week that I could not move past, one for each of those categories. But, happy to say that today I laced up my big-girl shoes and did the hard thing. One felt good, and the other is a work in progress. I like to make educated choices, where all the information is presented before me. However, I am not always afforded that benefit. Sometimes I have to make a choice based on the facts presented to me, even with gaping holes in the equation. And then sometimes, I am waiting for blanks to be filled that have already been filled, I just refused to see it. It's the classic case of only hearing what you want to hear. It is a defense mechanism that has served me... not so well.

My heart feels lighter today for having chosen to move forward and not stay still. I think that sometimes it is easier to just run in place, because at least then you know what to expect from your surroundings. It takes much more courage and faith to move ahead, to the unknown. My mind has been made up. In one instance, the right thing one out over the easy thing. And in the other situation, I chose to simplify. While I wouldn't say that either of these things felt awesome, they do feel resolved, in the sense that they will no longer consume my mind.

Quack Attack

So, I'm back! I know that you readers are just jumping in excitement. As well you should be because over the last few days my heart and my head have been working in overdrive, trying to figure this life out. And the realization I've come to is that I will never be able to figure this life out. And just when I think I'm getting close, there are loops and curve balls to keep me on my toes. But don't you worry, because while my life map did not unveil itself I did pick up a few treasures along the way. And, of course, I would love nothing more than to talk my way through them.
So, one thing that has become glaringly obvious is how difficult it is for me to follow. I am a leader. Always have been and probably always will be. So when the time comes for me to sit back and let others lead, I do not handle it all that well. This is true for all things, even my relationship with God. I tend to believe that I know the best way, the rightest answer and the most fool-proof methods.
Also, I'm not very patient. When I know what I want, I get very one-track minded. This is not necessarily good. The reason being is that I can get so focused on the want that I forget to ask if its what I need. I have been trying that a little more lately and finding that occassionally, I get lucky and those things are the same. But sometimes not. Right now, I am in serious prayer about some serious things and I am realizing that I am making them so much more dramatic and complicated than they need to be. God isn't trying to trick me or entice me. He doesn't need to. He knows what I need and when and all I have to do is listen and trust.
I have felt some joy and peace recently, amid confusion and it is because I have sought and asked for it. And it has come. It has come because I stopped clinging so tightly to what I wanted and decided to open up my hands and surrender, knowing full well that God will provide.
The last thing I want to say is that I am learning not to be a duck. Ducks get together and just quack, quack, quack about things. And all it amounts to is a lot of noise. If you look for things to be unhappy about and focus on things that make you grumble and quack then you set yourself up for being deeply unhappy. So, I'm steering clear of the duck pond and focusing on those things I know are good. My life is good, right now, no matter what. And I need to remember that. Because all I know for sure is this moment, not the future. And so I want to cease this moment and all it has to offer. Its like that Bible story about the servants who were given the money. Some buried it so that they could wait and save it, and the master said that was not good. But one used his and multiplied it and it was seen as good for him to take what he was given and make the most of it. This is what is coming to the front of my mind right now, as I am praying through things. I want to be responsible with what I've been given so that God will see that I can handle more.