Taking it All in

"Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." - Ferris Bueller

I know it has been awhile since last I used these fingers to type a blog. I offer no excuses. Except maybe this one: I have been INSANELY busy. When you have school, work, exercise, mothering, church and social activities to jam into your calendar you can't see the sky for all the balls you have in the air. This has been me in the last month. I have loved every second of this new schedule but it has left me drained and deflated a number of times. There are days when I carely make it to the bed before crashing out, and this is at the ripe old hour of 9 o' clock. God has breathed new life into me and I am enjoying the people and things around me to the utmost.

Summer has brought heat, sweat and many reasons to SWIM! My little guy is a regular water bug this time around. Swimming has become a daily occurence, which is good since it is a free activity. And then there was finals, followed two days later with a week long trip to Mexico. We came back tan and rested. And now that this Memorial Day weekend has passed I have one more week of summer fun before starting work and summer classes. Like I said, things move pretty fast. But what a ride it is.

In the next couple of days I hope to find the time to write about our trip and a few other thoughts that are on my mind. There are a couple of topics that I have been dying to write about. So, while these are my parting words for tonight, there are many more diatribes to come.

It's good to be back my friends and I am excited to find my blogging groove again. Thanks for hanging with me. If you are still reading these words, let me know. Sometimes it feels like I write this for myself. Which is fine if that is the case. A little verbal dissection can bring much clarity.

Friends in Low Places... (and high places and everything in between)

Some of you may not believe this, but I wasn't always the fun-loving, easy going person that I feel like I am most days. Once upon a time I was self-conscious and reserved and somewhat skeptical about people. You see, I had the worst thing ever happen to me when I was in 7th grade... I moved. And as any middle school child can tell you this meant social suicide. I was sad and angry and many other negative emotions. But, on that first day of school, in 8th grade, I found myself nervously walking to my first period class (I think it was math). At the beginning of class I was the new kid with braces and a Twist-A-Nerd pen that my mom gave me to make me laugh. By the end of that class, I was still all those things but I also had the beginnings of a new friendship. By the end of that year, I had the best friend I could ever have asked for. She is, amazingly, still my best friend today - 16 years later. And this was not an accident. This is how God works, not fate. God takes a "terrible" situation and makes it good. In fact, sometimes the purpose of the terrible situation is to lead us to this land of good, and sometimes better.

I have been blessed to have wonderful friends throughout my life. In my head, I categorize them into groups: college, terranova and CYS. If you know me, and consider yourself a friend, you likely fit into one of these groups. Some are cross reference friends and some were once dear but now distant. Like the saying goes: some friends are here for a season or just a reason. Whatever the length or depth of these friendships, they have all served a great purpose.

My college friends were with me when I truly found myself and started to actually like myself. These friends were there when I poured my foundation of salvation and built a faith on it, brick by heavy brick. Most of these people are still my biggest cheerleaders and allies. These are my go-to girls. No matter how long it has been, I can still share my heart completely with them and know it will be received.

My terranova friends have seen the rise and fall of my life in the front row seats. They have known me intimately through the changing of my many hats and stayed steadfast in their love and support. In my darkest hours, they have been brave enough to speak the truth. And while it hurt, it also made me believe in something bigger than myself and my professions of faith. These words of love showed me how to trust and depend on God.

And now, I have new CYS friends and they are just getting to know me. A lot of them don't know the facts of my past or the reasons why I am the way I am, but they are taking the time to find out. I came to them very broken and lonely, but also very willing to heal and step into that deep-end of new beginnings. What I have found with them is mercy and acceptance and genuine care. I am learning to let them in and to speak the truth in all things.

In all of these circles I have grown and learned how to be a true friend. I am blessed to know all of these people and feel honored to carry the evidence of a friendship with you in the person I am and the way that I live my life. Too often I think I have things figured out or summed up and I rely on my limited wisdom and confidence to get me through. But when it really counts, my friends have always risen to the challenge and showed their true colors. I recently found old albums and scrapbooks and looking back I see a life that was touched by others in the most remarkable way and it has made me glad in my heart. I had to tell you, as many of you read this, and the blogger world that I am better for having had you in my life. Many thanks.



And to my sister: who falls in every category and then some... you are a rock in my life and an anchor to my crazy emotions. You know me and love me in everything. You are the most hilarious person I know. Even though there are oceans of differences between us and the people we are, you are my greatest friend. You were obligated to love me based on your birth and blood, but you have chosen to love me as a friend. My heart is with you.