This is Jackson (left) and Shiner (right) and they belong to my sister and her husband. (Technically this is not a picture of Shiner but he looks an awful lot like that) It is fairly safe to say that these are both large dogs. And these large dogs are what dog-people call "inside dogs". Many of you may be dog lovers and appreciate dog stories. I am not a dog lover, nor am I a dog hater. I am dog-neutral. But I am using my sisters dogs to make a point about my life right now. So bear with me as I set this up by telling you two stories about Jack and Shiner.
In college my sister lived in a small apartment with a roommate and Jack. She often took him to the park nearby to let him run and play. On one occasion, Jack was running wild and free and my sister called him back to her. He bounded back at full speed and my sister panicked. He was heading straight for her and at the last minute she stepped to the right to dodge the blow. It seems Jackson had the same idea and the two collided anyway. Rachel was sent to the ground and had the wind knocked out of her. It is rumored that the force of his 85 pounds ramming into her at high speeds even cracked a few ribs. Jackson was unharmed.
On another occasion, Rachel and the husband took the dogs to a ranch to run and play. Shiner is a Great Dane so he is easily 150 pounds. In the midst of his running and playing he spotted a cow grazing. Shiner had never seen a cow before, so he was curious. But I guess he was also a little threatened by that cow because he took off at full speed and charged the cow right in the neck. He was sent flying through the air and landed with a thud on the ground. It took a few moments for Shiner to shake off the impact of his blow and he walked away shamed. The cow did not budge or seem phased by this assault and was unharmed.
In the last year, I have felt, at times, kind of like a caged animal. I knew that there was more beyond my situations and my environment, but I had put up some walls. I needed to feel safe and I needed to heal. I removed myself from harms way by controlling my environment and limiting my stimulus. It was a good life, but it wasn't life to the fullest. I got by and I even thrived, but I still longed for the wide open spaces of a life with possibilities.
In this new year I have felt free to open up and let myself run. I have jumped into ministry and Bible Study and have made some friends. I have said all of this before, but it is more than trying new things... it is opening myself back up to people and not being afraid of being hurt or rejected. I am learning that there is wonderful freedom in just letting life come as it may. It feels nice to enjoy my open spaces without worrying about the unforeseen dangers. I do feel like a dog that has been set free and is allowed to run and be uninhibited.
There is joy in just stretching my legs and running as fast as I can. I know this is a cheesy metaphor, but it seems about right. I am happy right now and I have finally gotten my joy back too. With this new energy and zest I am ready to tackle a few of my own cows and just see what happens. I may wake up dazed and defeated or... I might give it a few broken ribs. Either way, I am finding that seizing opportunities and enjoying the fun of living life is so much better than watching it from your safe place. Crazy things happen when you set something free that is used to being confined. The familiar is great, but sometimes a little adventure is good for the soul.
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